Thankfully, I have been blessed with many friends. And I must admit, many of them share the same ethnicity and religion as me, but there are a numerous amount that don’t. We differ from each other by the color of our skin, our beliefs, and sometimes even values. Today I want to take a moment to talk about one of my dearest and closest friends.
My best friend Ayse.
Many of us know us as a pair, and to some as a couple haha, as a dual team. When one shows up the other is usually close by.Our heritage and lineage may originate from two different parts of the world, we may be shades and feet apart (haha short person joke sorry Ayse), but these things don’t make a difference. Our friendship is not defined by how we look or the different tongues we speak in. We actually don’t have many similar interests surprisingly, we don’t watch the same shows, or listen to the same music. I’m a Harry Potter fan, Ayse is not, enough said on that subject. We are even completely different personality and emotion wise. Ayse I would say is more emotionally collected and compartmentalized, I on the other hand as Ayse likes to say express a wide array of emotions on a daily basis. So if you were to really examine both of us, we are polar opposites. Strange right? How can two people that are completely opposite, be such close friends?
Honestly, I don’t think I can answer that question 100%. But what I can say, is that whatever we have, is truly beautiful. They say blood is thicker than water. But I would argue that in a heartbeat. Blood doesn’t define a friendship or any relationship for that matter. What matters at the end of the day is the connection that you create. It’s the little things. Truly looking out for the other’s interest. Being each other’s cheerleader, well-wisher, and even parent at times. To be able to have the difficult conversations, point out each other’s mistakes, but to also have love and respect for each other. To work on building each other up, rather than just building yourself. Bonding together over your love for Allah. Whether it’s praying together, dressing up in sarees together, eating ice cream together, or washing 20 loads of laundry together on Christmas day to donate (yes we did this, pretty sure the laundromat owner was quite thrilled by how much laundry we did that day). It’s these memories and moments, a multitude of laughs, and a numerous amount of food and desserts eaten in the process, that have created such a beautiful friendship. ( Say Mashallah 😉 )
Thanks to Ayse I have become a better person. You always learn something new with her. Whether it’s learning how to make Turkish custard with bananas, or learning how to wear square scarves (which I actually did not know how to wear until I met her). There are many parts of me that have become more enriched because of her. I now have a liking for Turkish delight and Turkish coffee. For a hot beverage drinker like me who cannot take coffee or tea without sugar, I have come far in terms of drinking bitter Turkish coffee (with of course the Turkish delight on the side to make up for it 🙂
Ayse has clearly beaten me in the language department. I will admit she knows more Urdu/Hindi than I know Turkish. The numerous amount of Bollywood movies she has watched and the music she has listened to I’m sure contributed to her fast learning curve. But I am not too far behind with my Duolingo app that gives me a reminder to learn some Turkish every once in a while. And hey, Yalin pops up in music recommendations on Spotify for the few songs that I tend to replay occasionally.
If you made it up to here reading about how lucky I am to have a friend like Ayse, thank you. And if there is one thing I want you to take away from this long rant about my best friend. It’s to find yourself a best friend. If anything, a friendship that you can say is not solely defined by your common interests or your skin color but defined by something more than that. It doesn’t even have to be defined by how long you’ve been friends. I’ll let you figure out what that something more is, for me, I’m glad I found mine Allhamdullilah. Happy 6-year friendversary Ayse.